Why a Friend Referral Might Hurt More Than Help in Your Lateral Search

We are often asked by associates considering a lateral move whether they should ask a friend at a firm with an opening to refer them. On the surface, it seems like a slam dunk: you have an insider pulling strings for you. But the truth is, friend referrals are often far less helpful than you think, and in some cases, they can actually hurt your candidacy.

Here is why:

Top Recruiters Will Not Work With Candidates Using Friend Referrals

The best legal recruiters work on an exclusive basis. They value trust, transparency, and control over the process because their time and reputation are on the line every time they put a candidate forward. If you are submitting applications through multiple channels (friends, other recruiters, job boards) top recruiters will likely walk away. We have seen it time and again: the best lateral outcomes come from partnerships built on trust and exclusivity.

If you land an interview or offer through a friend referral, your recruiter is now sidelined. That means you are the one left to handle tricky conversations around compensation, remote work flexibility, signing bonuses, start dates, and more. These are sensitive topics often best handled by someone who knows the firm, understands the market, and can position your ask effectively.

Your Candidacy Becomes Tied to Your Friend’s Reputation

How much do you really know about your friend’s standing at their firm? Are they are low biller? Do people like working with them? If you apply through them, your candidacy is now linked to their internal reputation, whether it helps or hurts.

Your Friend Will Not Advocate for You the Way a Recruiter Will

After submitting your information through a referral link, most friends will not be following up with recruiting, prepping you for interviews, or helping you polish your resume and cover letter. They are not going to be pushing your candidacy or strategically positioning your strengths the way a recruiter would.

Associate Referrals Carry Little Weight

Firms do not guarantee interviews just because an associate referred someone. Unless your contact is a partner and actively involved in hiring, the referral usually does not carry enough weight to move the process forward in a meaningful way.

The Bottom Line

Friend referrals are not as much of a slam dunk as you may think they are.